Voltaire: Banned on Vulcan (Out-of-Print)

This item is out-of-print, and here for historical purposes.

SKU: PRO00149. Category:

Product Description

  1. Worf’s Revenge
  2. The U.S.S. Make Shit Up
  3. The Sexy Data Tango
  4. Screw The Okampa (I wanna go home)

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This is a maxi-cd of Voltaire’s Star Trek parodies. Packaged in an environmentally friendly 5″ cardboard wallet.

When not writing songs about hacking up his Ex-lover’s lovers or off-ing the man upstairs Voltaire spends a lot of time at SCI FI conventions. Usually he is promoting his comic books and Chi-Chian animated series but we all know he really just goes to them in the hopes of picking up a new Starfleet uniform or that hard to get, limited edition Tribble! Voltaire, you see, is an avid Star Trek fan (even stating in an interview on the Sci Fi Channel show “Exposure” that his dream in life is to play a Vulcan!).

One night after one if his shows at Dragon Con in Atlanta, he was invited to sit in on a “filk” session. Filk apparently is a convention phenomenon where musicians sing songs that have sci fi lyrics transplanted over recognizable folk melodies. He says, “There I was hearing these songs about Star Trek and I thought, damn! now, why didn’t I think of this?! My love for music and obsession with Star Trek collided and I started to write Star Trek parody songs.” At first he would play them in his solo acoustic shows at conventions and later recorded them and posted them on MP3.COM where they quickly rose up the comedy charts. Now they are available on Banned on Vulcan, a limited edition Maxi CD of Star Trek parody songs.

Banned on Vulcan contains solo acoustic versions of 4 Star Trek parody songs including the hysterical Worf’s Revenge: a Klingon rap that explains once and for all why Worf is the Mac Dad of the Klingon Empire. The USS Make Sh*t Up is about that pivotal moment in EVERY episode of EVERY Star Trek series where when finding themselves up against insurmountable odds the crew starts “making sh*t up!” (Bounce a graviton particle beam off the main deflector dish… etc…) The Sexy Data Tango really crosses the line describing what it’s like having sex with Data! And it’s written in Star Trek jargon! “Lower your shields and spread your necells to make room for his craft, while he thrusts his Delta Flyer into your big, fat, juicy aft!” and Screw The Okampa (I want to go home) serves as a campfire song for disgruntled crew members on Voyager who hate Janeway for stranding them in the delta quadrant. If you are fan of Star Trek AND love raunchy humor, then this is the disc for you!

Additional information

Weight .3 lbs

Release Year





  1. Reviews Editor

    From backagain.de

    VOLTAIRE is a well-known act from the great Projekt Records-label and it is known, that VOLTAIRE is a very humorous person, even, if his music comes out of the wide field of Gothic-music. But do Gothic and Humor except each other? Well, I don´t think so and so this MCD is a wonderful small piece of music and a loving parody on the Star Trek universe, which can only come from someone, who´s really a fan of Captain Kirk, Captain Picard, Data, Worf, “Bones” McCoy and all the others. VOLTAIRE performs four mostly acoustic tracks with lyrics about Star Trek, which all have really funny lyrics and melodies, which never leave your head again after listening to them the first time. It reminds me a bit on Norway´s Anton Balsam and his mid 90s tape classic “Fisken I Vanne” and stuff like this and also on one episode of the old German Audiobook series “Perry Clifton”, where a song was featured, which sounds a bit like “The Sexy Data Tango”. Well, this song is the most funny with it´s classic line “He´s fully functional and anatomically correct”, which is a quote from the TV series.

    This MCD is a re-release of the original 2001 release of the songs on Planet Grey Records and it is great, that the tracks are now available again via Projekt Records. This is definitely great stuff for all fans of VOLTAIRE and every Star trek fan (like me!) with a sense of humor. Call it “Science Fiction-Fun-Goth-Folk” or something like that. -A.P.

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